Body Image

I am beginning to know how an anorexic feels when s/he looks in a mirror. I look in the mirror with my new light weight self, and I see a belly. Profile wise I do not have to suck it in for my stomach to be lined up with my chest. My bmi is 23 which is just below average, and within the "healthy" range. My body fat percentage is 17% which is also in that range. I gained three pounds and am holding and act like I am grossly overweight. The above figures reflect the new "higher weight". Actually the weight gain may be attributed to putting on muscle. I have got to take it seriously when people tell me how skinny I am.

I look around and I see skinny people all over. How non-special it really is. I used to think no one was that skinny. Weird.

--Motto--
Mens conscia recti
-a Mind concious of what is right.
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Aquarium

I want to add fish to my aquarium. Is it a want or a need? Clearly it is not a physical need. I do not need more fish in my aquarium to live. I do find watching the aquarium relaxing. I need to relax. Rehab is encouraging me to take relaxation class at CBH. I know watching Angel Fish is about as relaxing as I have ever seen. Perhaps I can justify buying a pair of angelfish today. I'll go to Eastland Pets. If I see some I like, I'll buy. I also want a male betta for my Lily Oasis. I think I will keep that in my bedroom.
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rant
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Netflix

I noticed today that Netflix has a Louisville address now. Atlanta had been the closest to me. It should get my movies back to them faster. I am pretty happy. I al going to stick with the 3 out plan, as the 5 out plan is another $10, and last time I was on 5 it was like work. I had a movie marathon yesterday, watched 2. watched a 3rd today. Now I have to send 3 back, and I will not have any until at least wed or thur.
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rant
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I'd Pick More Daisies

A goof off friend gave me a copy of this poem when I was in highschool. I remember showing it to our teacher. Discouraged, she said to me, he should probably pick less daisies.

I'd Pick More Daisies

My Minnesota Thrift Shop Finds

I had some lucrative days finding vintage.

At Ragstock I was able to acquire

• Vintage Tuxedo pants, in my new size


• two Japanese Baseball Jerseys, Two!!!


• a Kimono - I am kicking myself for not getting the Obi.

At the Salvation Army I was able to pick up

• a set of Fondue Forks


• a Clue


• Catch 22


• Home Designer Color forms


• I wish I had seen the kitschy kitchen chairs in Lexington, and I would have snapped them up too

all in all, fun. Despite the controversy with my parents, who are supporting me now. Spending money I do not have on things I do not need. But a $4 Kimono - Please!
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rant
I am an empathetic person. Especially after what I have been through, but I am losing mine for Wilford Brimley. All I see on TV is him telling me about diabetes testing supplies and nebulizors. mm Enough already get a new job.
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Motto

Home: "Mens conscia recti"
is a motto of "Phillips"

Mind concious of what is right.
sounds a lot like my "code"

Chrissie

I talked to Chrissie in New York the other day. She is now a chef in one of New York City's better restaurants Gramercy Tavern. Pretty good job placement there Ms. Chef.

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rant
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Mini Skirt

Imagine my shock to hear my "theme song" in an ad on TV. It is for a clothing store in Edina called Len Druskin. Mainly designer jeans.
Len Druskin at the Galleria

I think I am destined to go there and buy some diesels in my new size 31 or 32.

Post op recovery

I have been an emotional basket case periodically. I have bust into tears like I am watching some sappy movie. I guess in a way, I am living out one. I am still humbled by relying on my parents for money and support like some bug over grown teenager. When I get back to Lexington, I am going to have to take care of my financial issues. I am pretty sure its 7. With the medical bills and my unlikely candidacy for disability, I honestly have no choice.

I do have many plans for my life then, though. I am going to seize the opportunities, make plans. Follow through on them, creating my legacy, which was, incidentally, my New Year's resolution.
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rant
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